feels better getting it out and my new perspective

so i was able to vent my mountains of frustration without blowing up. and it took a lot of stress off my back. i was so worried that telling someone would change their view of me negatively that i held it so tightly that i was never able to let it go, or even cool off. i listened to a book on cd that i had already heard a couple years ago and it was the beginning of my new outlook on life. if you havent read it, you have to get the book "Between a Rock & a Hard Place" by Aron Ralston. his story will make you think about how you view life. he was the adventurer who got stuck under a boulder in a remote area for 6 days, 5 nights with little food or water in 2003. he had to sever his arm and climb out (among other things while trapped) in order to survive but he lived to tell the story. he still climbs but now has truly found his passion in life. funny as it may sound, some of the emails that have been forwarded in the past week or so have really hit me too. all of that combined with some time to really think has brought me to the conclusion that if we can survive through this, we can last anything. i believe in what i said before God, my friends and family. you cannot pick and choose which parts of people to love. if you truly love someone you will accept any flaws that come up. i knew from the moment we met, just over 14 years ago, that we were to be together. what else could be worse than what we are going through now? i feel like its worth working on. so, we are being more thoughtful of how we talk to each other when we get frustrated and we have begun sharing more responsibilities. it seems we are acting a bit more adult. i think this time will really help. we can do this together.

i am also going to work on getting back to who i am too. for some reason i feel like i have also lost myself in this. i dont feel like i do things that make me happy. i used to be a different person and i am trying to figure out where that is now in me. gotta get going, my daughter is being persistent in wanting dinner.